I just don’t understand how this happened. But here’s a picture of a lemon from my backyard
WHAT THE EVERLOVING FUCK
when life gives yoǘ̻̬͓͎̣̟̩̦͢ ͪ̂̀̆҉̳̘̝̺̀l͇̬̹̞̻̥͕̥̗̒̎ͩ̋ͥ͆e͙̭̭̠̣̠̊́ͩ̂̓̀ṃ̛̍̂͛̈̏o̠̪̪ͤ͗͘n̵͉̣ͭͧ̿ͧ͛̀s̷̠͑ͬͫͦ̅͡ ̸͐ͤ͘҉̦̺M̰̹͙͇ͮ̉ͫͅȦ̻̔̅̇̑ͭ͛͋͘K̠̻̫̤̇̀ͥE͂ͪ͏̱̤͚͕ ̞͔̜̬̑ͯ͑͢ͅŞ͔̦̩̳̣̖ͮ͊ͨA͈̓͂̈́̀̀̚͘C̡̠̟͉ͪ͆̔ͤ͂ͪR̬͙͕ͪ̀͠Ĩ̵̖͚̑̊̓́F͎͕̄Iͬͧ̀̂̑ͪ͟͏̴̪̤ͅC̢̰̝͓̗͛ͬ̔̍̓́́̚̚Ḙ̶̠̰̳̩̳̊ͭͮ̇̇̚̕S̻͖̣̰̒̈͟
every villain is lemons
And finally, dear listeners, a reminder; several concerned citizens have brought to the city’s attention an irregularity surrounding this summer’s citrus harvest. City council would like to remind all enterprising fruit pickers to exercise reasonable caution when acquiring these fruits. Grasp the fruit firmly around its circumference, pull slowly but steadily to avoid damaging the tree, and under no circumstances heed its demands of you. Do not acknowledge or obey the depraved whisperings of the demon fruit.
And now: The Weather.
This was the stupidest prompt I ended up writing and it doesn’t even have Derek in it I’m sorry.
Stiles has a school project so he buys a new phone and leaves the number on different platforms, a public bathroom, the side of the bridge, on a napkin, in the corner of a menu, and little cards on the bus, all saying ‘Call Me’.
Title: “Call Me”
(aka Beacon Hills is small and my Jeep is in custody, don’t ask.)
Pairing: None, just Stiles.
The first call was from an old man who asked him if he knows that he has vandalized the side of the bridge. Stiles had to listen to the ‘when I was your age’ monolog for a good fifteen minutes. It’s not like he didn’t expected such call, it was already on his chart to begin with but it was kind of disappointing.
You looked inside of me and you saw hatred. That’s not victory.
Robstar snuggle doodle dump! ovo/
They are going to be the death of me. Someone stop me.
Okay so the Colbert Report posted a link to the Ellen Page interview, right
And I was already happy it was a fan favorite. But THE COMMENTS
IT’S JUST TOO GREAT
ADAM AND EVE NOT ADAM AND MAPLE LEAF
|—||if you don’t think history is a truly inspiring subject you’re wrong (via fashiondisastercecil)|
i finally got around to answering this anon, and i really really really wanted to. even though it’s sloppy, i had fun. <3
it ended up a million times cheesier than how it started, i don’t know how i managed that.
It’s 2089. all cops have been replaced by genetically modified dogs that let children pet them, help old ladies cross the street, chase down criminals, never eat donuts, bark at cat-callers, analyze dna, easily track down murders, pee on white collar criminals, and tear the faces off of rapists. utopia has been reached.
How was this accomplished you ask?
Well its simple
Dogs are colorblind